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Your Story is So Boring (Mine Included)! And ‘Noise-fasting’

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noise-fasting

Have you ever wondered about how boring you are?! Now, don’t take offence, because I can assure my own story is probably more boring than yours! LOL

I don’t mean this rudely, but seriously, until we see beyond the incredibly firm identity we have created for ourselves which we do not question (until we do) we really are walking cliches. We are predictable and very dull. Have you not noticed how similar people are? Have you heard people’s conversations and how predictable their reactions and words are? Have you noticed how people will repeat the same thing, sometimes over and over?

People’s me-stories / identities are essentially made of the same stuff – the attempt to be somebody, the attempt to be right, the attempt to look good, the attempt to get somewhere with each conversation, the attempt to compensate for something considered to be missing. No story is that unique, no matter who one may think one is.

It’s no wonder that a husband and wife soon stop talking like they did at first, and after many years may hardly talk at all, except about what they’re having for dinner or what’s on the news – they’re bored out of their brains with the same old, same old! Many partners behave as if they know the other very well, and yes, they do in the sense that they know each other’s stories only too well. And that’s what makes their communication with each other dull. Two people becoming a couple – of stories.

Only the story falling by the wayside can remove the predictable dullness that settles into all relationships eventually and open up real looking at and appreciating of one another.

The dullness leads us to want and need drama and excitement so much. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad – we just need the drama fix. Hence the news is so addictive. Or it can be any manner of drama, according to our particular story. The drama feeds the need for the story to get more exciting. We need to fill what we perceive as a void. That’s why people love the sound of their own voices so much because silence brings us face to face with what we don’t want to feel.

Try this: try ‘noise-fasting‘ one day when it is convenient for you – spend a day talking only minimally, only when you really must. You may hear that life truly has its own sound and it’s called silence 🙂 If emotions or stressy feelings arise in the silence, just let them be. They’re part of the silence too.

Life is not intrinsically boring. It is intrinsically alive and constantly new.

When we get off our high horses and come back down to earth, we may find that it’s pretty ok down here 🙂

Thanks for reading.

Love,
Reena

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debbie

Reena, I must say that I admire the leap of faith you took to writing your own blogs. They have been great lately and with this one you really nailed
a few good points!
It`s interesting observing people and how they communicate.. (or not communicate) with each other. Even if you don`t speak the same language that they do­­­­­, tone of voice and body language speaks volumes. Then when it gets so bad that 2 people in a relationship are simply bored stiff and just milling around one another to the point that they are just “Two people becoming a couple-of stories“ (excuse the French keyboard) but personally at that point.. or even way sooner, I would say: what`s the point? Really?!
But many stay and the “drama feels the need for the story to get more exciting” I love that and how true it is!!
Also your response to Tom`s comment and the search to find the right religion, beliefs, spirituality, teacher or whatever. I like what you say:
“How can anyone be a spokesperson for an incredible Mystery.” & “Life is not intrinsically boring. It is intrinsically alive and constantly new.” Amen!
Good one Reena, thanks 🙂
Debbie

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Bill

Congratulations Reena,
an excellent, and fascinating post that is completely wrong and completely right 🙂 It needs dissecting a bit, but first of all a disclaimer. I am in an altered state of mind. In the lowest state of reality I have a filthy cold, didn’t sleep well last night, and I am currently trying to drink myself into oblivion in an attempt to sleep without waking every 15 – 30 minutes coughing my lungs up. I’m not sure if it is a curse or a blessing, but I still believe that I still have some objective sense (of course I know that I could be writing total gibberish, on the other hand the booze I’ve had may have stripped away several layers of inhibitions…..or uncovered the core of my thoughts…. or I’m just pissed !).
“Have you ever wondered about how boring you are?” The answer has to be NO ! Ask the right question, or invoke the right stimulus and I can shine through, but otherwise I am sure I am more boring than you !!
“Have you noticed how people will repeat the same thing, sometimes over and over? ” – yes and it’s bloody annoying ! Am I guilty of it – almost certainly……BUT……sometimes I delude myself that given the right stimulus I can be original. I hope it happens more frequently than I suspect.
“People’s me-stories / identities are essentially made of the same stuff – the attempt to be somebody, the attempt to be right, the attempt to look good, the attempt to get somewhere with each conversation, the attempt to compensate for something considered to be missing.” This is all true – in theory, but everyone has a story to tell that is unique – only x has ever talked to Y, for instance. Reducing it to it’s very base level, the day that male A tells the entire truth about his encounter with female B is the day of the second coming of the great prophet Zarquon.
“It’s no wonder that a husband and wife soon stop talking like they did at first, and after many years may hardly talk at all, except about what they’re having for dinner or what’s on the news ….. Many partners behave as if they know the other very well, and yes, they do in the sense that they know each other’s stories only too well.” I’m not so sure this is a negative thing. It seems to be poo-pooing one of my dearest fantasies – that it is possible to know someone so well that most communication is non verbal. That’s a bit sad in many respects.
“The dullness leads us to want and need drama and excitement so much. It doesn’t matter if it’s good or bad – we just need the drama fix…….We need to fill what we perceive as a void. That’s why people love the sound of their own voices so much because silence brings us face to face with what we don’t want to feel.” This is a very mixed message. Yeah, I need drama and excitement, but I’ll add that voice includes both the spoken word, and the written word. At the moment I am facing the void, and writing this fills a little hole.
As I write this I find myself in a strange, but amusing situation. I find that I want to shout to the world that I have thrown off the bonds of normality, and yet I find myself in a very real way still constrained by them. Today I’ve had a couple of brief phone calls, but otherwise I have been on a “noise fast”. Writing this has been a partial “fix”, but there is also another realisation.
I feel I’ve already worked out the answer, but I am sure you, Reena, can provide some extra answers. I feel totally crap at the moment, and I long for someone to mop my fevered brow, but I can’t escape the boring fact that I can manage my fever better than anyone else, and worse than that, any masochistic volunteer would have to have the patience of a saint !
Somehow it feels like believing that what I experience in my reality can be a curse upon others. However if there are any masochistic nurses out there my address is …………….?
Life, you couldn’t make it up 🙁

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digitalfuse

Bill, thanks for your comment. I will just say that when we are in our story it all remains full of paradoxes and sound and fury (a la shakespeare) and it most definitely could be made up, since it all is. 🙂
It’s one of those things – until the story is seen the story is believed to be real.
Don’t know if this makes any sense to your comment, but there we are 🙂
Finally, get well soon!

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Phyllis

It feels like I (if there still is someone here) could have written your last blog. I get so bored with it all; I said the same thing to a friend the other day; I feel like I am watching a sit com on TV (seeing my life happen before me) and am so bored I switch the channel. But all the other stories on all the channels are equally boring. There is a deep longing for what is real, what is lasting and what is simulataneously still and dynammic, and yes for the stillness. I love having a friend come meditate every evening with me and I love it when he leaves, so I can drop back into the stillnes, the space, the gap as Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, my teacher, called it. The space between the words, betwwen the drops of rain, between the notes in an aria or in hiccups. Doesn’t matter. That’s where the best show in town is happening, in beween it all. Wish I could be in London to hear Tony Parsons with you Reena and hope some of the straight talk will get to me via your blog. Love from Belgium to all you seekers, ex-seekers and (no) finders. Phyllis

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Don O

“There is never nothing going on. There are no ordinary moments.”
~Way of the Peaceful Warrior
It is also a part of the bridge scene in the movie.
live, love, enjoy life
Blessings

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Rose

To me the boredom issue is a reality check. Knowing we are created in the image of God helps with this issue I think by using our creative powers that be to overcome boredom.

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Burt Harding

Loved your article and it is refreshing.
Love you, Burt
Burt’s site: http://members.shaw.ca/burtharding/

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digitalfuse

Burt, lovely to see your comment. Love you too, and may we speak soon. Reena

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tom

wouldn’t two awake people be boring to each other since they’re coming from the same “place” so to speak? isn’t it this eternal boredom with itself that makes the one consciousness seemingly split itself into the multitude of individuality for variety?

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digitalfuse

tom, boredom in the un-awake sense arises when that which is doesn’t seem enough, when there is a need to escape, get something else. For awake people it would be more stillness rather than boredom, just pauses between doing, and without expectation of oneself or the other that things should be different.
In terms of your second question, that’s a mystery that I don’t think anyone can rightly answer. The Intelligence and All Pervading All That Is – can there be boredom for what is all already? If It is everything already then what more could it become, except more of the All, even if it looks and feels different. I know people sometimes say that Source got bored so It created non-duality, but that’s a nice story – how can anyone really be a spokesperson for an incredible Mystery? Better to let the Unfathomable be Unfathomable without trying to find reasons and this points to there being no purpose to anything really. The me wants a reason, but beingness is alive and fresh, and is its own reason.

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mark

it sounds like business as usual.

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